Living with Parents - The Difference between Manhood and Adolescence

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I started doing some research on which sex tends to leave home first. Males or Female? Whilst on my search for the answer I spoke with some of the guys at the Office of National Statistics and believe me when I tell you, I was shocked by the answer!

Turns out that in every age bracket, women always leave home before men. I was stumped!

Statistics show that in 2011, 1 in 3 men and 1 in 6 women aged 20 to 34 lived with their parents in the UK. This would mean that women are almost twice as likely to leave home before men. Another interesting point to mention is that 39% of men who left home were living in their own household as a couple whilst only 10% of men were recorded as living alone. Could this be a contributing factor to why many women seem to establish a stronger sense of independence at much younger age when often compared with men?

This information really got me thinking! What is holding us guys back from being ready to leave home earlier in life? I started looking at some of the key differences between a guy who is living with parents whilst operating in Manhood in comparison to a guy who still demonstrates an adolescent mindset.

Adolescence Mindset Whilst Living With Parents

Frivolous Spenders

Frivolous spenders seem to place a high priority on their "wants" and things they believe will contribute to improving their image. So it's often second nature for men who still find a sense of freedom in their adolescence to believe it's necessary to spend the majority of their wages on either the latest gadgets, clothes or the most eye catching accessories for their car. Even though they may fail to contribute to the "up keep" of their parents house, they still confidently have the ability to "borrow" money to get through the month from the very people who are already providing a roof over their head, practically rent free.

Treats The House Like A Hotel

This kind of guy is always up and out! The type of guy that if you were to call his parents house, they'd say "I think he's in his room" shortly before finding out that he left the house without saying good bye. Rest assure he'll be back just in time to receive a prepared meal from one of his parents. For some reason, men with adolescent mindsets seem to be experts in knowing the specification of everyone else's role within their parents house a part from their own, which consequently means that he expects someone else to clean up after him or needs to be convinced to tidy up after himself.

Always Has Something To Prove

The catch 22 about being older than the age you act is that technically you should be at a level of maturity where your parents have no need to nag you. However, the adolescent mindset dictates that you should be exempt from your parents house rules because you are legally an adult. But your lack of help causes contention between you and your parents and leaves you feeling like you constantly need to prove that you're a "grown man" through resistance rather than with a maturity to proactively help out. This often causes many men to feel frustrated and consequently causes them to retreat; treating the spare room of their parents house as an isolated studio flat.

Manhood Mindset Whilst Living With Parents

A Contributor

Even though this type of man may be unsure of how long his stay at his parents may be, he's aware that it won't be forever (unless he's a designated carer of his parents). With this knowledge he works hard, saves towards his future and consistently contributes financially towards the running of the house. His aim is to continue to build healthy habits that will allow him to be a good steward of his own home and ensure he does not become a burden to his parents.

Always Willing To Serve

Operating in manhood can empower you to serve from a place of gratitude without feeling insecure, inferior or undervalued. A mature man finds pleasure in taking the opportunity to serve his parents, as he is aware that it is the least he can do in demonstration of the love and respect he has for his parents. Whether it's running the odd errand, cooking the occasional meal or cleaning, he gets on with it without being asked. He understands his experience at his parents home is merely a practice ground, setting the tone for the type of example he will hope to one day set for his own family.

Takes Responsibility

Over time we learn that not all rules are written and not all expectations should need to be constantly voiced. With this in mind we know that It takes a proactive man to consider the wishes of his parents at the beginning of his decision making process, rather than having to be reminded of the house rules like a child. A man who operates with a manhood mindset may choose to filter the type of people he brings into his parents home, come in at a respectable time or help with DIY jobs around the house. All with an aim to fulfil an unsaid expectation that was naturally set at the point of agreeing the living arrangements presented by his parents.


I think it's important to remember that charity begins at home, along with our ability to develop our responsibilities and the type of relationships we choose to build. Our parents home should be our training ground, no matter how old we are.


If you were living back home with your parents, what advice would you give your younger self?

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